Renewal from Sexual Addiction (RSA) is a Christ-centered, 12 Step based, self-help support group for men seeking recovery from lust and compulsive sexual behaviors. We believe that the cornerstone for our recovery is the power, grace, and love of Jesus Christ. The rest of our recovery "house" is built upon; the fellowship of the group, having a safe place to share our struggles, pain, and victories, the accountability of the group, and the mutual support of group members throughout the week.
How do you know if RSA is for you? We offer the following observations of what is true for us.
Many of us share a common history of some type of childhood abuse. We were yelled at, laughed at, told we were worthless or stupid or ugly, or responsible for everything wrong in this family. Today we recognize this as emotional abuse. We were neglected, minimized or overlooked. Today we call this emotional abandonment. We were slapped, beaten, knocked down, or struck with objects. Today we know this to be physical abuse. Lastly, we were touched, pawed, and coerced or forced into sexual activities. Today we call this sexual abuse. Whatever abuses we suffered we learned that to survive we had to find a way to not feel the overwhelming and unbearable pain.
Instinctively we built walls around our hearts. Lust is a magical wall in that it gives the illusion of connection. It is transparent. We can see people on the other side and we can pretend that we are connecting with them; laughing, joking, living, sharing, but all the while there is this wall which deadens their voices so we can barely hear a sound, and distorts their faces ever so slightly - or greatly - and absolutely ensures that they will never harm us because they can not touch us. So we feel safe, but we remain alone inside our prison.
We have always been aware that we are alone. As children we interpreted the abuses we experienced as justified. We believed that we were at fault for what had happened to us. Unconsciously we knew that we were somehow defective, that we were different from other human beings and not "normal." Sex with ourselves or with others gave us the illusion of acceptance and thus the "cure" to our worthlessness. We became addicted to the "cure." We needed a constant supply of sexual activity to stay "cured." So we used others for sex instead of having relationships, or we bought our "cure" through magazines, or prostitutes, or we sold our bodies to others, or we masturbated, but always we lusted. To lust was to live.
Lust had become the most important thing in our lives. Some of us were willing to risk and lose everything to get and keep it. Only when we came face to face with the truth that lust was a liar did we become willing to let it go. Lust never fulfills its promise. It promises to connect us with others and make us whole. But it never does. If you identify with these issues, and if you are weary from your struggle, then we invite you to fellowship with us as we daily seek the Lord's guidance along our journey of Renewal from Sexual Addiction.